i'm gonna stop blogging for a while now
moving over to punggol today for a week... with all my cds and books packed in a bOx
so i'll be all alone :)
man i hope this will work out
i'm s'posed to be doing some intensive revision over there
maths chemistry maths chemistry maths chemistry maths chemistry
....ZzzzzzzzzzzZ.....
you know what i'm gonna miss most while i'm gone?
my mp3 files :P
October 28, 2002
October 27, 2002
October 25, 2002
got this super duper long survey off some forwarded email and decided to do it and post it here...
...... just because rain is coming!! (?)
BASICS --
NAME: olivia
NICKNAMES: stef, oliver and erm. fatimah
BIRTHDAY: 28091986
AGE: 16 and going older
BORN IN: kk hospital, singapore
CURRENT LOCATION: amk ave 3
WHAT ARE YOUR FEARS?: dying without having my dreams fulfilled
DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS OR GLASSES?: yes, yes
DESCRIBE WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE: 177cm tall with short black layered hair and a hint of brown, black eyes, framed by shiny blue spex, high cheekbones... normal looking lips?
WHAT IS YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE?: bit of an idealist a lot like a dreamer
DESCRIBE YOUR PERFECT MAN/WOMAN: we gotta have a mutual understanding!
MOST EMBARASSING MOMENT: i don't remember
THE NAMES OF YOUR FUTURE CHILDREN: nikki, nikxi or josh
WHOM DO YOU LOVE?: just a special few
SHOWER AT NIGHT OR MORNING?: both
WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR MORALS?: most from my ideas and experiences
FAVORITE --
ICE CREAM: cookies&cream
FOOD: italian (tho i've never been on a full course italian meal before...)
DESERT: anything not too creamy
VEGETABLE: brinjal, long beans, french beans, cabbage...
FRUIT: cherries
MEAT: chicken
CANDY: jellytots
GUM: bubble...gum ?
BEVERAGE: iced tea, nice cold MINERAL water in time to come
MOVIES: wedding singer, dead poets' society, coyote ugly
TV SHOWS: just for laughs, art attack
TALK SHOW: i don't watch a lot of tv
ACTORS: nil
ACTRESSES: nil
CARTOON CHARACTER: woodstock from snoopy and winnieee the pooh bear
SEASON: erm... the monsoon season?
ANIMAL: meow!
JOB/CHORE: dusting
BRAND OF CLOTHING: reebok/union bay
SONG: brandtson - holly park
THEME SONG FROM A MOVIE: nil
TOWN TO VISIT: ..?!! how about woodlands? absolutely adore the library..
PLAYGROUND EQUIPTMENT: swings :)
SALAD DRESSING: thousand island
COLOR: green/glittery colours
THING TO WEAR: tshirt with berms and sandals
JEWELRY TO WEAR: this necklace made up of wire and a few beads and a small bone pendant
PLACE TO BE: where the sky is in full view
SPORT: aggressive inline skating
NUMBER: 15
FLOWER: whatever that looks sweet
INSIDE JOKE: it's pretty sadistic so i don't think i'll mention....
BRAND OF SHOES: not really important
FRIENDS TO HANG WITH: everybody i know
THINGS TO DO: skate, read, be online, attend gigs, lie on my back and stare into the night sky for hours etc
SMELL: peach
MUSIC: refer to the column on the left
THE FUTURE SIDE --
DREAM CAR: something someone can drive me around with
CAREER/FAMILY: it's too soon to say!
DO YOU WANT KIDS?: yes after i'm done with handling my life and dreams
ARE YOU GOING TO COLLEGE?: no i don't think so
WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN FIVE YEARS?: working towards a degree in australia
WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN TEN YEARS?: poor, living in an apartment and living life
WHAT DO YOU THINK THE FUTURE WILL BE LIKE?: great! (pants on fire)
ARE YOU GOING TO HEAVEN OR HELL?: i'm going places
HAVE YOU EVER --
DRANK ALCOHOL? yes
SMOKED CIGARETTES? no
DONE DRUGS? no
IF YES FOR ANY OF THE PREVIOUS THREE, DID YOU GET CAUGHT? no
BROKEN THE LAW? yes
RAN AWAY FROM HOME? no
BROKEN A BONE? no
SKINNY DIPPED? no
PLAYED STRIP POKER? no
PLAYED TRUTH OR DARE? yes
FLASHED SOMEONE? no
MOONED SOMEONE? no.
KISSED SOMEONE YOU DIDN'T KNOW? yes
BEEN ON A BLIND DATE? yes
BEEN ON A GAME SHOW OR TALK SHOW? no
BEEN IN A FIGHT? yes
BEEN OUT OF YOUR COUNTRY? yes
RIDDEN IN A FIRE TRUCK? no
BEEN ON A PLANE? yes
COME CLOSE TO DYING? yes
SNUCK ONLINE? snuck online ?
CHEATED ON YOUR BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND? no
GIVEN SOMEONE A PIGGY-BACK RIDE? yes
EATEN A MUD PIE? no
BEEN IN A SAUNA? yes
SWAM IN THE OCEAN? yes
HAD A DREAM OR NIGHTMARE THAT MADE YOU WAKE UP? yes
SHOT A GUN? no
SEEN A WHALE WITH A POLK-A-DOT TAIL? yes
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT --
ABORTION? cruel? especially if used as a form of birth control
BILL CLINTON? i don't give a fuck
YOUR COUNTRY? screw this place
ALTERNATIVE MUSIC? *face lights up*
HEAVY METAL? seldom listen to it
CLASSICAL? only at ice skating rinks
OLDIES? as long as they don't sound tacky
CLASSIC ROCK? cool
SOAP OPERAS? turn offs
YOUR PARENTS? of course
ANIMALS? cute furry little animals!
AIRPLANES? hate the staleness of the air.
AMUSEMENT PARKS? fine only when i feel like it
SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE? why not?
GOD? bullshit
WHAT IS --
YOUR GOOD LUCK CHARM? don't really have one
THE WORST SONG YOU'VE EVER HEARD? i haven't heard enough yet
ON THE WALLS OF YOUR BEDROOM? just a soft board.. shifting into a new place very soon
YOUR FAVORITE THING FOR BREAKFAST? ham and cheese sandwich
YOUR FAVORITE THING FOR LUNCH? don't usually take lunch
YOUR FAVORITE THING FOR DINNER? mom's cooking
YOUR HOUSE LIKE? 2 living rooms, 6 bedrooms, 2 kitchens, 4 bathrooms, 2 storerooms :P
YOUR FAVORITE RESTURANT? no preferences
YOUR FIRST CHILDHOOD MEMORY? me with a headful of curls in underwear, seated on the floor playing with plastic cups
WHICH IS BETTER --
COKE OR PEPSI? pepsi
ORANGES OR APPLES? oranges
ONE PILLOW OR TWO? two
DEAF OR BLIND? deaf
POOLS OR HOT TUBS? depends
BLONDES OR BRUNETTES? depends
TALL OR SHORT? tall
TV OR RADIO? neither one
DRESS OR SKIRT? skirt
SOLIDS OR STRIPES? stripes
SWEET OR DILL PICKLES? sweet
CHIPS OR POPCORN? chips
COOKIES OR CAKE? cookies
BEANIE BABIES OR STAR WARS? beanie babies
MOVIES OR TV? movies
MUSIC OR THE COMPUTER? music
TELEPHONE OR TV? telephone
MCDONALD'S OR BURGER KING? depends
DAIRY QUEEN OR TCBY? dairy queen?
BEACH OR POOL? beach
MOVIE THEATER OR RENT? depends
GARAGE SALE OR THRIFT STORE? depends
WALMART OR TARGET? only been to target
INTERNET OR PHONE? internet
EMAIL OR SNAIL MAIL? depends
DAY OR NIGHT? night
SWING OR SLIDE? swing
ROMEO OR JULIET? erm?
GAP OR ABERCROMBIE & FITCH? gap?
ARE YOU --
A VEGETARIAN? no until they have more varieties in the dishes they serve
A GOOD STUDENT? unless you piss me off
GOOD AT SPORTS? only in certain areas
A GOOD SINGER? just an average
A GOOD ACTOR/ACTRESS? yes
A DEEP SLEEPER? seldom
A GOOD DANCER? probably not
SHY? seldom
OUTGOING? only when i'm interested in what you're saying
A GOOD STORYTELLER? just on paper
PREPPY/SLUTTY/SEXY/SPORTY/ALL OF THE ABOVE? don't label me!
A FOLLOWER? i doubt so
DO YOU THINK THAT YOU'RE POPULAR? can't really be bothered about that
DO YOU --
ENJOY PARKS? yes
LIKE PICNICS? yes
LIKE SCHOOL? no
LIKE THE COLOR PINK? depends
WET THE BED? no
LIKE TO SING? yes
LIKE TO SHOP? yes only when i have the dough to spare
LIKE TO PARTY? depends
GET IN TROUBLE A LOT? i just don't get caught
WEAR MAKE-UP? only when i feel like it, which seldom happens
CHEW YOUR FOOD BEFORE SWALLOWING? i haveee to!
LIKE TO TALK? no
LIKE TO LISTEN? yes
WOULD YOU --
EAT A LIVE BABY HAMSTER FOR A MILLION DOLLARS? yes
GO TO A HANSON CONCERT IF YOU HAD FREE TICKETS? yes
EVER GET A TATTOO? yes
EVER GET ANY BODY PARTS PIERCED? yes
KILL SOMEBODY YOU DIDN'T KNOW FOR FIFTEEN MILLION DOLLARS? no
EVER WEAR A PAIR OF UNDERWEAR ON YOUR HEAD? depends
DATE AN INCREDIBLY UGLY, YET INCREDIBLY RICH GUY? no
HAVE SEX WITH A TOTAL STRANGER FOR A MILLION DOLLARS? no
TRY TO PICK YOUR NOSE WITH YOUR TOES? no
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? at the moment; 'what is life with no dreams?'
so there.
sleepless nights.... how i hate sleepless nights
sky is orange and rain waits to fall
do yooouu hear thunder?
nights like this make you wanna go back under blankets
enveloped in covers you drift off to dream...
sleepless nights .
man... i was awoken at 2am
friend and i figured it was him who sort of sent vibes by just thinking of me while i was in lala land
and tada
i received them :) and then i woke up.
weird how these things work.
so for a while, we did what we do best.... sms.
well the services are lagging right now and i just made myself cold ham and cheese sandwich (breakfast!)
waiting..... just waiting for the messages to come through
this is super boring
THE SILENCE IS DEAFENING!
star light star bright... will you wish on a star tonight?
October 23, 2002
ARRGHHHHHHHHHHASKDH!#@#$HK:@#H$!K:H@#$K:!@JH$:K!#BR#BRH#@HVRC#@$!HG$@!!@VH$@!#G@!H$@!VBRH!@#R!#@G$BH@!#G!@#V!@H$JG!@H#!@V#H!@V!!!!!@#GARGARGFGAHEBRHEAG#@GKVHR!KV#R!HAHRBAEBFBAHSBRHAEBRAERARRRRRBHADFSBAEHRQH#GB!HK#BR#!BF#HQKVR!H#R!BRH!R#!$!$B#HV!DFFARRRVHASGDBARHEAV#!$!!!!!$HB!@#$H!V@%RH!#@%R#V@RA!VR!!!!! ITCHING TO SKATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE !!@$##K@$H@K#$H@K#!H$@#K DYING TO SKATEEEEEE!#$NK!@N$:B!$!B@B!B!B!B!B!B!@$K@!$NK#@!#@!K@$H!#!!!! S|ARRRAHGADKJRQWKERJQWO#R#@@@@@@@!@#$@#!!!!! Q$R@#JK$JH#$H!KH deliverrrrrrr the evilllll from meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee (?)
don't you ever dare judge or label me.
October 19, 2002
i hate hearing the pleading cries from a kid
i hate
them parents who don't do shit to stop the cries
but to
cry with them - -
do you remember your childhood?
because i sure don't remember much
i don't remember having dreams and wishes
don't remember asking for bedtime stories or kisses
don't remember wetting my bed or waking up for a drink
don't remember begging for barbie dolls and polly pockets
don't remember hoping for tooth fairy to come by
don't remember wondering whether if santa will visit
i don't remember if i believed the fairy tales i was told.
okay the heat is getting to my head............
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla
it's been a pretty good day
caught mr deeds with sam and decided cineleisure has the best seats.
big spacious and comfy...
and i had a really weird encounter today
i wonder how often these things happen?
ever caught a total stranger's eyes and held them longer than the usual gaze?
i was in hypno when it happened for the first time in my life
he didn't finish his smile for some other guy and it dripped into mine and he looked sort of idiotic but what the heck it was his eyes i was staring into
he had really kind eyes!
but by then i was already making my way out so i broke it by returning the.. smile?
and when i walked out i was like
Wow what was that man!
i mean, i wouldn't have noticed him this way if out eyes didn't meet.
big big possibility i might see him again
how do you live where there are no dreams?
October 15, 2002
October 12, 2002
gone case..... a blooody gone case... fuck man i've screwed it big time. fuck. fuck. fuck .f uck. fuck. fuck .fuck .fuck .fuck . fuck!.
did i mention that one of my friends think i sound like this back up singer in sunny day's song about an angel?
and she wouldn't believe the band isn't mine.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
damn.. this is totally fucked up. fuck.ed.up.
argh.
SEND ME AWAY WHY DON'T YOU
/me dies from shame.
let go. AGAIN!?
bored & bothered
well have you ever had this feeling of indecisiveness
it makes me feel all ... . . twitchy and ... . .
.. . . . ... . . restless.
the two adjectives don't really go together but what the heck.
today (yesterday actually) is/was my last day i will feel super energised and good.
from all the skating and ..! jamming :)
jammed in the morning and skated at night.
had our first *gig* (a 1 song gig) in the studio when this bunch of jokers were standing outside listening and then suddenly started moshing to one of our songs. :P
still felt high from all the skating just a while ago before i got reminded of this problem which's been bugging me quite a lot these past few days.
*sigh*
(pms?)
it will be consistent revision for 2 months when the sun rises today.
*sigh* again
there is soooo much i've yet to improve in my skating!
can't wait for the next session... which will be like in 2 months' time. duh.
this won't do.
i have to and i will. do my revision. and stop thinking about the plans i have in mind for my long holiday.
bleah.
perhaps time will also get me ouuuuuuuuuutta
this agooonnnnnyyyyyyyyyy y y yyyy
think i'll just go sleep.
still have sucky social bullshitting studies lessons later.
sleep is the best medicine.
how do you feel today?
October 10, 2002
i realised i have not been writing as much as i used to
it's also been some time since i last wrote proper poetry.
maybe it is just the kind of schedule i have adopted that's made me stop writing a bit?
i really hope that's that.
was going through my past entries in the older diaries (yes the rEAL ones..) and sheeeshhhh!
so so much depressing stuff :(
the books really should be burnt.
last few entries were on happy stuff though.
what has happened?
don't you just miss feeling miserable sometimes
meow.
devoid.of emotions.
October 9, 2002
October 6, 2002
songs about rainbows
and what's on the other side
rainbows are visions
but only illusions
and rainbows have nothing to hide
so we've been told and some choose to believe it
i know they're wrong wait and see.
someday we'll find it
the rainbow connection
the lovers, the dreamers, and me.
who said that every wish would be heard and answered
when wished on a morning star?
somebody thought of that and someone believed it
look what it's done so far...
what's so amazing that keeps us star gazing
and what do we think we might see
someday we'll find it
a rainbow connection
the lovers, the dreamers and me.
all of us under its spell we know that it's probably magic...
have you been half asleep and half you heard voices
i've heard them calling my name
is this the sweet sound that calls the young sailors
the voice might be one and the same
i've heard it too many times to ignore it
it's something that i'm supposed to be..
someday we'll find it
the rainbow connection
the lovers
the dreamers
and me
went to a gig at jammerzpit earlier
it was like some marathon... i think there were 12 bands in total that performed!
most were punkrock bands
one or two alternative bands
2 emooo bands.
a miracle i did not fall asleep during the gig
butt hurts though. maybe from too much sitting
or maybe from the falls i've had while skating on friday
cops visited us again before we could skate to our fill at cbd
and some guy dislocated his finger. so the finger was really out of place.
looked freaky..
there were skateboarders around too
man... i have not seen anybody with a board run so fast before :P
we all got away
'cept for a few skaters.
sigh the ledges were really smooth and over waxed
maybe i should go down to blk14 again
before that nice place gets demolished.
i feel like i am speaking in point form
and i feel sleepy tired and bewildered
so i should stop here and go to sleep
...was gonna type good night
like, who will i type it for?
